Check in with the size and scope of what you currently call your Big Dreams:
(You know, not the sleepy-time-astral-cinema kind of dreams — we’re talking about goals and aspirations.)
Secondary Dreams Pretending to be Priorities
Is the Dream you’re currently working with The Dream or have you dialed it down a notch or two?
Is what you now call your Dream actually a Plan B masquerading as a greater goal?
Have you down-sized your Dream?
Lowered Expectations
Have you lowered your expectations?
…because you think you need to be more practical?
…because you think this one will be a bit easier?
…because you don’t want to be disappointed?
…because someone told you to be realistic?
Allowing yourself to be side-tracked
When did your Dream change?
How far back do you have to go to find the original version?
Why did you change it?
Tangents intended to be temporary
What happened that sent you on a detour?
At what point did you decide this detour, this Plan B, this tangent would be a “better” course?
Procrastination
Are you preserving your “Real” Dream in an abstract state because you can’t afford to fail? So maybe you’ll work on one that’s safer, second best, not too big to lose?
Beyond hope into action
What is the difference between a Dream and an Intention?
Does your Dream have a specific end result that you can envision, or is it just a vague hope?
Is your Dream a real Goal or Intention with action steps you can take to make it reality?
Playing too small
Have you settled?
Have you compromised?
Are you currently telling yourself that newer, smaller, less grand version is Enough?
“Just” is a dangerous word
What limitations have you placed on your power to manifest without consciously realizing it?
Look for signs of self-imposed limitation in the word just:
- “I just don’t want to be alone” is not the same as having the relationship of your dreams.
- “I just want to be able to pay the bills” is not having a fulfilling career that fills you with a sense of purpose and provides you with more material abundance than you need.
- “I just want to lose twenty pounds so I can wear a bathing suit” is not having a fully holistically healthy lifestyle.
Time deferral and Conditional language
Has your ego — your fear of failure or success — been feeding you messages about conditions and/or time-deferral?
Look for the red-flags in your self-talk — expressions like if/then, as soon as, once, after, when:
- “If I can X then I will allow myself to pursue Y…”
- “As soon as my kids go off to college…”
- “Once I meet the right person…”
- “After I save some more money…”
- “When I get this one project completed…”
Are you really doing a number on yourself with those multi-faceted dream-killers that sound like: “If I can just… then…”
Diminished Power
Are your intentions taking three times as long to manifest?
Are your goals coming in at the half-way mark?
Are you getting only partial results?
Smaller doesn’t equal easier
Are you working too small?
Are you living too quietly?
Are you just getting by with less and telling yourself that’s okay?
Who said dreams should be grounded?
You say you’re being realistic.
You say you’re being practical.
Are you actually saying…?
- “I’m not capable.”
- “I don’t deserve more.”
- “I’m not good enough.”
Maybe the answer is NOT dialing down, lowering your expectations, settling, compromising. THAT‘s why you’re feeling drained, unmotivated, unexcited, lacking passion and drive… You’re lowering your vibration to maintain, to be okay, to get by.
Congratulations — you’re succeeding at what you’ve settled for.
Maybe what you’re “missing” is a Bigger Picture. Maybe the way to raise your vibration and to (re)gain a sense of empowerment is to go really, REALLY B-I-G.
Check in with your dreams this week and investigate. If you find evidence of down-sizing or down-grading you can always course correct.
To reinstate the bigger vision for life, start asking yourself “What if I could…?”
WOW Slade, nothing like 33 questions to set the wheels of personal introspection in motion.
Yet, a part of me wonders what role the drone of the hive plays into
our personal ‘Dreams’.
The sky is falling, businesses are failing, tragedy abounds……
How exactly does one insulate from the hive?
Perhaps it’s the awareness of what is them and what is me that grounds us.
A quest … indeed.
Powerful Post! There is way too much settling going on. I love your language hints as a way to ferret out the symptoms. Lot’s of good gut check questions here. Makes me want to CHARGE!
Deb,
I probably could’ve been all Internet-Marketer-ish and called this post “33 Questions about Your Dreams” or something like that. I’m a little lazy in the “copyblogging” department, huh?
Seriously, though, these really were questions that I have been asking myself, very much separate from the Chicken Little Channel.
Tom,
Thanks, man! Especially coming from you with your expertise in the career coaching department, that means a lot. “Gut Check Questions” — again, a better title for this post. Hey, maybe I could do a “Gut Check” Series… (That could be annoying… there were scant few comments on this one…)
Language cues/ word choices are always a good diagnostic tool for me.
I wanted to tell you this: This is the BEST post that I’ve read in some time.
So thank you for being such an inspiration.
-BrownEyed
oh, dear…
Thanks so much, great post!
Holy guacamole!! I thought this was just posted today, odd, considering you normally post on Sundays. I come to find this is an older post I happened to receive in my inbox today. I’m not one for cliches…..but…this really did come at a most needed time! Thanks, Slade!
This was resent by the Ghost in the RSS Machine. It was totally out of my control…
Feedburner does that to me a few times a year — just “randomly” picks some old post and emails it. This post was originally published in June 2009…
Isn’t that wild?
I always wonder “Who really needed to hear that today?”
Hi Slade
I guess Feedburner put me on the need to re-receive this post, too. I however recalled it clearly from it’s original posting, not just a deja vu moment.
I have to admit to needing to hear this again right now. My dream seems to be so big, the voices talk to me with things like “oh please, do you really think those in-charge people are even going to notice you’re alive let alone getting an opportunity to interact?”
The message in your post particularly pertinent to me I think is regarding the navigating being grounded and dreaming. I’m not often grounded, something I struggle with a lot – you know – wishful thinking, too gullible, wears only rose-colored glasses are the kind of things that have always followed me around . So when I do get grounded I tend to apply blanket coverage.
I’ve since subtitled your post giving me a tool to useto counteract the voices in my head encouraging me to obscure what pulls me higher, hide my silly idealism, settle realistically or give up, a personal reminder, “Uncover”.
Have a nice holiday season, Slade.
Barbara
Good stuff, Slade. I’ve been reviewing my dreams / goals lately since so many of my minor goals (but not the major, spiritual one) have crashed lately. Although I’m beginning to doubt that the major one will ever come true, but at least it’s given me something to cling to all these years, and I’m still pushing for it.
Your inspirational writing is much more interesting and to the point than your ghost stories (although I like those too).
xoxo,
bob