Don’t Ask Your Spirit Guides

If you’ve received a reading from me, then you know that the Board Room is the main metaphor I use to illustrate the way your spirit guides work with you. It’s crucial that you realize you are not praying to these entities — they are not an authority; you are the authority. You don’t work for your spirit guides; your guides and guardians work for you.

You are God — Act Like It
Spirit guides and guardian angels exist to serve the will of the Creator | the Source | God — you are a cloned physical incarnation of the Creator, empowered with your own free will. In your personal reality, you are the most direct manifestation of God — you are the way by which the Universal Consciousness experiences Itself, and the team of benevolent spirit entities assigned to assist you in this mission share your agenda.

You are the leader, here. God doesn’t have a self-esteem problem. Does the idea that you represent this kind of power make you uncomfortable? Responsibility is an imminent component of power — free will is an enormous responsibility. An even greater task is wielding power — acting as a true leader — with the highest intentions and for the greater good of all involved.

You came here to exercise, express, and practice this most supreme purpose. You must Step Up. Being a strong leader doesn’t mean you are good at everything, that you know how to do everything, that you don’t require help… The most effective leaders learn how to surround themselves with others who are more skilled and knowledgeable in areas they are not. The best leaders know how to delegate. [Check out Andrea Hess’s post on Managing Your Spirit Guides]

If you feel powerless, ask yourself:

  • What happened to my power?
  • Who did I give it away to?
  • Why am I afraid to use it?
  • Is it easier for me to let someone else be in charge?

You were born with power and free will — it’s inherent — you are imminently worthy. Each and every moment, with every breath you take, you have a choice to access your power. Or not.

Your spirit guides do not have the power and free will; they are following your lead. The abundant Universe you’re waiting on is actually waiting on you. Commit to the responsibility of your position.

Communicating with Your Guides
With your commitment to the power of your position in mind, approach working with your guides as the leader of a team. You’re the CEO, here, meeting with your team of most-trusted advisors.

Set the Agenda
You’re the boss and you called this meeting to order for a reason — what is it? (It’s not to roll around on the floor throwing a temper tantrum and crying Why Me — that’s a performance… Not a strategy-planning session.)

Tell your guides why you’ve called on them:

  • What’s the overall goal of this session?
  • What are your intentions for soliciting the assistance of your guides at this moment?

If this is your first time communicating with your guides, your agenda is to establish contact. You’d like to meet them. You want your guides to introduce themselves to you or simply affirm for you that they are present. So take a Roll Call.

*A word about “asking”
We are socialized as children — trained — to “ask politely” when we order someone to do something for us. Yes, you should be positive; of course you should be grateful and respectful; thank them — absolutely. When working with your spirit guides, asking from a place of powerlessness, with no clear intent or direction, is spiritually impotent and frustrating for everyone involved.

Your guides are not omnipotent and they are not in charge. Take a good hard look at your word choice and the energy you’re projecting — are your cries for help too passive, open-ended, immature, or indirect?

If I advise you to “Ask your guides to this” or “Ask your guides to that” assume that what is really meant by “ask” is really “tell.” You are the authority; they can’t assist you or help you without your orders.

  • Tell your spirit guides what course of action you are considering.
  • Tell them to provide you with confirmation that this is the right path to take.
  • Tell them to provide you with the resources to manifest your intentions.

Don’t worry so much about making the “wrong” choice — it’s much easier for your guides to let you know “Bad Idea” when you begin to move forward. If you’re heading down the wrong fork in the road, and every witness knows it, you’ll almost immediately encounter roadblocks left and right — you can pull back and go the other way, with confidence.

But keep in mind also that a crazy detour, difficult challenge, or hard lesson may be exactly what you most require — your guides will assist you in that, as well.

Don’t Ask — Tell
Instead of asking “What do I do?” rewrite your cries for help as delegated tasks:

“Here’s what I feel the best course of action may be… Here’s what I intend… Here’s what I see as a potential way forward…”

  • “Assist me in making that happen.”
  • “If there’s a better way, bring me options.”
  • “Find me the resources.”
  • “Arrange for me to discover the information I need.”
  • “Put the people and the opportunities in my path.”

Help me out with the examples:
Can you share a question you’ve asked your spirit guides to help you with — the desperate, ineffective plea transformed into an empowered command for assistance?

Or do you have a real stumper that’s blocking you? A question that’s not working, that you’d like some assistance in reworking?

One of the most powerful and effective ways our guides assist us is through one another. It’s also easier sometimes to channel wisdom for another.. Leave a comment and let us all be your guides.

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57 Responses to Don’t Ask Your Spirit Guides
  1. Monisha
    September 26, 2008 | 5:55 pm

    Slade–I never got to thank you properly for your response. I felt wonderfuly energy from your response and it always stayed with me as a connection.

    I wanted to write to share with a blog which I started as a way to connect with what inspires me. Today for the first time, I wrote about gratitude about my weight loss struggle for the last 15 years. I can’t believe I could ever genuinely feel gratitude for it but I do. I have learned so much that now…dieting has transformed into self-feeding. Something told me to write to you about this particular post. If you have a chance, do check out

    So when I looked at the message you wrote to me, I love that you wrote that my body is my greatest divination tool. I have suddenly awoken to the fact that i am in a relationship with my body, and it is a giving one. i can’t believe how my weight loss journey has also at the same time been about my relationship to myself, in a deeply loving and ironically gentle way. (isn’t it beautiful?) so i wanted to share that with you and i thought it best to share with the post i wrote.

    The thing with my throat….and my current job. I am making my way on this. Acknowleding the messages I was getting was an important first step. Part of it has to do with using my voice as a way to own my power. and making a plan…I desire very much to see the solution. for now still in progress, i am laying down at least one brick though. working on laying down more. i love that i found your site and your energy and what you have to give!

  2. Sonn
    September 26, 2008 | 9:09 pm

    (YET, for some reason this week, i find myself facing fear. so much fear i go to work and feel it rising in my throat. i have felt myself knock against despair, pretty much every day i go there. its been tough. its a job and firm i want to leave. who i am is not seen nor invested in. and when i get scared, its only immature efforts i seem to be able to make to reach out to my spirit guides. it just feels like a bad place. and i am wondering if you had tools or suggestions for facing it or helping myself.)

    I can totaly relate to what is/was happening here….I was in a work situation myself that was bad to say the least and my body was reacting in a negative way, thinking about going to work gave me back aches and headaches.

    I had no backup plan, I just left. I made the decision to leave on a Sunday and as soon as I did that I felt a wave of happiness and freedom just float over me, on Monday I handed in my resignation.

    The tensing of your throat tells me that you have something that needs to be said, unspoken words have a tendancy to do that.

    I know for myself, this time of unemployment I need to use for my own growth :)

  3. archie
    December 10, 2008 | 9:15 am

    Personally I feel its all about how our energies are channelized.our conscious takes the right decision and directs energy towards the right cause.

    You stirred many souls slade.
    Great post.

    @ Sonn
    I have experienced it myself what you are talking about.Somethings just don’t feel right.But I have learned to take charge and make things work my way.

  4. Liara Covert
    January 31, 2009 | 2:09 am

    Recognizing a conscious and deliberate intention within yourself is a powerful thing. People often underestimate the implications of tapping into their own inner-knowing. When you interact with a spirit guide, it is useful to recognize you invited this being for a purpose. You never forget the reasons. You may only permit fear or judgment to take control of your mind temporarily. When this happens, you discern the inner conflict as an exercise to work through it so that you eventually master it. Guides are constantly empowering us to be true to ourselves. It takes a period of experience to begin to grasp that.

  5. epsychic
    March 16, 2009 | 12:16 am

    I’ve been communicating with my guides for years, and would like to congratulate you on a well written and informative post. Your advice is excellent.

  6. Janelle
    October 15, 2010 | 7:53 pm

    Your article makes some good and interesting points about intuition and guidance. I’ve been receiving what feels like guidance, but it’s got me feeling confused and lost. I would love some feedback/insight.
    I’ve just had the experience, over the last 3 months, of feeling really uncomfortable, rather than comfortable, because of my intuition. I’ve recently had the experience of my intuition telling me a man I met (who I felt a real connection with, who seemed thoughtful and kind, whom I quite liked) was ‘someone I can hold on to’ (in fact, a voice stated it very clearly 3 times in a row when I was spending time with him – it really startled me) and I have since had a great deal of synchronicities that have served to remind me that this man exists, even though I have not heard from him in over 2 months (he lives far from me). I’ve also been dreaming about him regularly, and when I check in with my intuition, it still says he will come back for me. When I check in further, my intuition tells me to have faith and patience.
    All of this has led to a real crisis of faith. I have often gotten in trouble for not listening to my intuition. Now, over the last 2 years, I’ve made headway in listening to my intuition and been really working on trusting myself and my intuition, and following that even when my rational mind objects. And, it’s always right.
    Yet, this latest experience, where my intuition has been telling me one thing – that he’s someone I can hold onto, and that he’ll be back, and the physical experience is that this man stopped communicating, has served to, paradoxically, both lead me to doubt myself, but also lead me to try to understand intuition, tune in more, and start praying and asking for guidance on a daily basis. Talk about confusion. Furthermore, I cannot understand what I am being guided to learn from these dreams and synchronicities. After doing a lot of work to tune in and release ties to the man through daily visualizations, which have felt really helpful, I assumed the synchronicities and dreams would dry up, but they haven’t. Does anyone have any insight into synchronicities, intuition, strong connections with individuals, and my story? I see that I am getting messages, I don’t know what to do about it, especially when it seems so contradictory.

  7. Rene
    December 2, 2010 | 5:52 pm

    So there is someone that I met and I had a feeling for while that he and I knew each other before in another life in other capacities. I have been asking for assistance on finding out of this was a true connection or imagined connection. Just this week I said something like “I will get my answer to the issue of (this person) I said it before bed a couple of times. Well I had been doing that off and on. This time I got my answer from a different source the next day and I am now convinced that this person and I have a REAL CONNECTION. Now I am more than a bit curious to get to the root of why we have this connection.

    There was also a dream that I had a while back that I wrote down and it was about someone keeping a child for me. Well it turned out those people had broken up and the child they gave me in the dream was the age of their relationship. Any help on that one would be great. Who was I in the dream to be so close that they would give ME the child? <>

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