What My Intuition Feels Like
When I receive Messages from the Universe, they often resemble neurotic episodes. (I'm kinda not really kidding.)
You would think you're supposed to get used to the way that your intuition pings your intellect. There's this expectation that if you're a "professional intuitive" you float above and glide about like the dignified fairy queen Tara, voiced by Beyoncé in the movie Epic. Every gesture filled with slow motion control, grace, intention...
Confession: I just don't gracefully hover much, people. I tend to... vibrate. Recently, at a meal with friends, while attempting to share the way my mind works, someone at the table clocked me as Dr. Sheldon Cooper. Everybody laughed. (Thanks. I've never felt less sexy.)
When I perform readings or channel information (or just get caught up in an exciting conversation, for that matter) -- when I intentionally, consciously "reach for it" -- I become a little manic.
I privately refer to my intuition as my squirrel mind.
You know how it feels when you can't think of the right word for something, but you can think of ten or twelve words that are close? So you go ahead and rattle off about eight or nine of them? Your mind wants to run around in several different directions at once, reversing itself as quickly as it makes a choice. And then turning around on that decision.
Yeah, it's like that. For an extended period of time… say, thirty minutes, or even an hour.
When intuition arrives unbidden -- when the impulse comes looking for me -- it doesn't jump across a neat little electric arc to the intellect. It strums the guitar strings of my emotions. While stomping on the heavy metal distortion pedal.
A lot of people receive intuitive impulses as a subtle warning in their physical bodies -- like butterflies in the belly, or a tingling in the hands, or fine hairs standing up on the back of the neck -- which, from this end of the scale, sounds highly preferable.
Here's the problem with emotion -- when your emotional body gets zapped, emotions run the show. Emotions wreak havoc on every other kind of antennae you have out there. Your body chemistry goes haywire, you definitely can't think straight, and the combination of it all creates a feedback loop. The whole process gets intensified.
My emotions don't seem to have many nuanced settings, like the 1 - 10 on a stove range dial. No, it's just all either OFF or HIGH.
So, any -- I mean any -- sense of "No" feels like the sky is falling.
- "Not such a great idea" becomes "OH MY GOD YOU ARE GOING TO DIE IF YOU PROCEED IN THIS DIRECTION!"
- "Hmm. I feel an inkling of something in the ether. Wonder what it could be?" within my head sounds like a screaming queen inside a reverberant cave "OH MY GOD SOMETHING IS HAPPENING! I FEEL IT! I REALLY FEEL IT! IT MUST BE TERRIBLE! IT'S COMING! AHH!!"
Managing an ongoing relationship with my intuition is like fostering an intoxicated manic-depressive toddler. One whose blood sugar is a little low and in desperate need of a nap.
...to be continued here...
If you don't feel discouraged by the thought of employing your intuitive abilities as part of your career, then check out my Professional Intuitive Training and Mentoring programs.
Image credit Simon Pais-Thomas via Creative Commons on Flickr