JT -- aka Jane Throne, aka Big Jane -- is my primary spirit Guide -- one of two guardian angels that are always with me.
She technically has neither name or gender: these are associations that I have given her because it helps me process our relationship.
I first became aware of her at the age of four, and at that time simply thought of her as The Big One. If you had asked me to describe her then, I would've said she looked like an Amazon Julie Newmar in a nightgown (borrowed from the Laura Ingalls wardrobe collection).
Jane's "appearance" -- for lack of a better word
If you were speaking to me and able to see Jane manifested in physical form:
- she stands just behind my left shoulder (at the 7 o'clock position, and close enough to me to rest her hands on my shoulders)
- she's nine-and-a-half feet tall (although she's really closer to something like eight feet tall; her feet do not touch the ground - as if she stands on an invisible box about one-and-a-half feet high. If I reached behind me with my left hand, I could grab her ankles or clutch the hem of her gown.)
- she has shoulder-length, wavy, strawberry-blond hair
- she wears a pale lavender shift - in the style of a long Empire-waisted nightgown
- she carries a sword strapped on her back, Xena-Warrior-Princess style
- she is incredibly flat-chested for a woman of her stature - probably because she is not a woman at all.
- she is bare-foot
She does not have feathery, stork-like wings in the strictess, traditional visual interpretation, although she does appear to be sheathed in a thick, pulsing glow - which slightly blurs all detail, obscuring her features. This light is capable of dancing independently of her movements. Append that: Jane does sometimes seem to have very obvious and literal wings, though my perception of them is not based on sight -- I feel and hear her wing movements at times, and during these moments, I would swear that they are large, powerful, feathery, bird-like appendages.
There are blue herons that sometimes fly away from the larger lakes in this area to strut around in smaller water courses. On a few occasions, I have startled a heron in the creek bed at the back edge of my yard, on the way to the woods where I take walks. They tend to take flight before I even see them, and so the associated senses with lift-off are the sound of their large flapping wings, the displaced movement of the air beneath their more rapid, initial wing beats, and a shadow just overhead -- but all this close enough to make you automatically and instinctively flinch, or duck out of their way.
I sometimes have a similar set of physical sensations, only in reverse, and always behind me -- as if the angel has swooped down and landed behind me...
My Guardian Angel Jane is both breathtakingly beautiful and unnaturally generic looking -- like a supermodel that's been airbrushed too much. Or a figure in a Maxfield Parrish painting. Her expression is one of constant, patient amusement -- slightly vapid and patronizing, like Glinda the Good Witch from the film version of The Wizard of Oz. She is also capable of facial expressions that are enormously over-acted, as if her body language is trained to communicate with children across the distance of a large auditorium.
If Thomas Kincaid did portraits, or if a figure were to step from the doorway of one of his cloying, wisteria-drenched cottages, she might resemble Big Jane.
You - Jane
She communicates with me telepathically in flashes of imagery, but I do also experience her voice clairaudiently, speaking in conversational English. She has a British accent and sounds a lot like the actress Jane Leeds, who portrayed Daphne, Marty Krane's live-in nurse on the television sitcom Frazier.
This is how I came to call her Jane.
Her presence is much like a spiritual nanny. Another reason why I associate her persona with the Brits is because -- at first -- she seems quite aloof, haughty, austere, or morbidly shy - a frigid snob - unless spoken to directly, at which point she is quite the chatty cathy. She's a doll, once you get to know her. She is comforting presence -- because of her, I am never alone.
All is as It should be
Jane's favorite no-comment, political response to many of the Questions I ask her, or the worries I attempt to discuss with her -- which is, more often times than not, simply infuriating in both timing and context -- is:
"All is as it should be."
Yeah? Thanks, love -- tell it to my bank account and my broken heart... : )
Both Guardian and Guide
Although Jane acts as my primary Guide, I do not think this is the norm. It is my understanding that most people are attended by an entity who has actually incarnated -- lived and died before -- in human form, and does "most of the talking" -- acting as a conversational spokesperson for all the other entities that attend you. Jane is a Guardian -- an angelic entity -- but she is also a primary Guide who performs a role typically occupied by a specially trained, once-living human being.
Jane is also a throne -- a specific phylum or rank of angel -- a warrior in the personal army of The Queen of Heaven, Ascended Master Mary, Mother of us All.
Jane was assigned to me before birth, but I became conscious of her around the age of six, upon the occasion of my remembering my Chart -- the Life's Purpose I had chosen and drafted prior to this lifetime. My Chart predetermines the life of a priest devoted to, and in service of, the Mother Goddess.
Mary sent me one of her Thrones to serve as my primary Guide. This is a perk similar to being tutored by a teacher who also happens to be the Headmistress or Principal of your school.